Outrageous Opinion Session: Call for Outrage (CFO)

While many fierce battles have raged in the networking community --- circuits vs. best-effort, hard-state vs. soft-state, ad-hoc vs.haddock --- one issue that had been quietly simmering has now surfaced to threaten the unity of our community. Perhaps "lefties vs.righties" is as good a term as any. Of course we are referring to those who parse "Outrageous Opinion Session" as "(Outrageous Opinion) Session" vs. those who parse it as "Outrageous (Opinion Session)." It comes as a shock to most of us that exactly the kind of time-flies-like-an-arrow lexical ambiguity that completely obliterated the field of AI should now menace us with doom.

The SIGCOMM organizing committee is taking urgent action to prevent the spread of discord. By a swift application of the principle political insight of our times --- that Truth is simply what we assert it to be --- we henceforth assert that rightism has been a clear and utter failure, and that the left parsing, "(Outrageous Opinion) Session," was obviously the intent of the SIGCOMM founders.

Accordingly, we are happy to invite submissions of truly OUTRAGEOUS OPINIONS for this glorious back-to-basics session. Please send your proposals by email to timothy.griffin@cl.cam.ac.uk, or submit them verbally at SIGCOMM to any member of the Outrageous Program Committee:

• Paul Barford
• Tim Griffin
• Sylvia Ratnasamy
• Jennifer Rexford